woensdag 10 november 2010

Awesome night

I just got home.
It’s 06:55 AM on a tuesday.
(This is Lotte again by the way)
I was sitting at home, watching tv a little, cooking a bit, being bored mostly, when the thought hit me of going out.
Not in a clubbing kind of way, but in a calm, relax moment kind of way.
It already turned dark, and as I told you about the weather before, its cold and rainy, so i put on tons of warm clothes.
While walking to my usual sightspot, I crossed a group op Maroccans, cause I live next to an islamic bar.
One of then, named Charlie, lives nearby.
I always see him wandering the streets.
Once he drove me to the trainstation when I was late. A real nice quiet guy.
So last night, he greeted me, and we started talking a bit.
He interrupted me by letting me know he was hungry, and if i were too.
I actually kind of was, so I agreed to a trip to a nearby restaurant.
We ate and talked about life. (yeah cliché)
He told me the worst thing.
His life exists out of this:
He gets up at three in the afternoon, he eats, he gets stoned, he drives around town, looking for people he knows to talk to, he has drinks in bars, he drives around some more, gets stoned some more, and goes home to sleep again.
He told me that the trip of driving me to the trainstation (10min drive) was a highlight of atleast a month.
And not in a flirting way at all. He has lost every passion for life, because of filling his days like this for about 13 years.
I felt so bad for him. I kinda wanted to think of ways to wake him up again, and get him to live.
But i’m always so afraid, and don’t think i’m conceided, to get up in a guys head, and make him fall for me, or really like me. That has ruined almost every friendship with any straight guy i met. I hate that awkwardness.
I’m not in love that quickly or often. I think I’ve only been in love once, and i’m 22.
And he was gay.
Anyways, so I tried talking to him, entertain him more, and act unattractive, yet funny.
He only laughed a little. He was just so numbed.
A friend of him called. His internet wasnt working, and he wanted Charlie to drive by and fix it.
I went with him, and we ended up sitting there, all night, the three of us.
We were watching funny video’s on youtube, I introduced them to my world of music.
Songs by Damien Rice, Yann Tiersen, Radiohead and even Louis Armstrong sailed by.
I pulled Charlie out of his seat and ordered him to dance.
He tried to, but looked like a spastic trying to climb a ladder.
I dont think I ever laughed that hard.
After that, i turned up the karaoke, to make him sing, cause i was sure that had been a while too.
I asked him which song he liked, or what band.
His reply: I don’t know bands or artists.
Me: Ofcourse you do.
Him: No, i mean it. I mean, I know Michael Jackson.
Me: …..
Him: I know the song with the.. * hymnes thriller badly offtune, barely recoqnizable*
Me: ……
Him: But, if i like it, like the songs I just heard, thats good enough right? I mean, I don’t really care. Whatever you want. I’ll just listen.
And its like that the intire time.
Where do you want to go? I don’t care, i’ll take you anywhere. Do you want this car? You can have it. Really, I dont care about it anymore. Do you want something to eat? No? Chocolate? No? Anything you want, just say it, its ok. Its your call. I don’t care, I don’t have anything else to do.
Especially that last one, ” I don’t have anything else to do.”
He says that so often, that it makes me wonder if he’s just looking for my comfort, or if he’s really as gone up in his empty world, that he doesnt even notice that.
The only thing he keeps mumbling about is his big plan.
He’s intending to import cleaning products from Germany, and selling them to Holland.
But, he doesnt have a website, so its not possible, but if that works out, he’ll be rich and move to Turkey.
And another plan; He says he has over 10.000 relatives. If he’d ask everyone for 100 euro’s, He would end up with 10 million euro’s, and buy a 5 starred hotel in Turkey, where all those relatived can come and stay for free whenever they want.
I still don’t know if I find his last one brilliant, or idiotic.
But all of the things ‘he’s working on’ are things that will never happen, work out or turn to a succes.
You can notice by the way he talks about it, that he’s told the story a million times.
Over years and years, and it just wont ever actually happen, because there too random, and take too much energy, which he lacks big time.
I never met anyone so lifeless, so empty, so out of passion for anything.
It’s like the only thing he cares about, is me sitting besides him, talking to him.
Distract him from his miserable days.
So, I gave it my all last night.
I made the guy dance, sing, laugh till he was out of breath, he even made jokes. And they were kind of funny.
We talked about old stuff, like the Goonies, Labyrinth, Cartoon Network.. Things that bring those good old comforting feelings back. We made eachother quess cartoons by letting the other listen to the intro theme for 5 seconds.
I know it all sounds sort of lame, but it was so much fun. And seeying him live up a little, seeying him recoqnize things he hadn’t thought about in years and years, and seeying him smile big made me feel so happy.
He just drove me back, and thanked me for a night in years.
Somehow I felt the same way.
I’m gonna make him one hell of a cd for his following little roadtrips around town.
And i’m going to sleep now.
I’m free tomorrow, but i’d be emberassed to sleep the day away. again.
I learned a lesson today.
Even people completely without stories, looking good, passions, dreams, educations, fancy professions, or any of the things people care about usually, can still be interesting. Not in an attractive kind of way, but as a person.
He’s like an unconcious man on a brancard, being electrocuted by the things around him.
The shocks wake him up a litle for only seconds, and he falls back into coma.
He wakes up, lookes at the world in awe, and falls back.
I want to wake him up for real. Without him knowing i had something to do with it.
he looks kind of like this:
With the stare and everything.
I had a great night out.
Totally random, with a stranger, to another strangers strange house.
And yet, a lot of fun.
it’s 07:52 now, and i’m not tired anymore. I crossed the sleeping phase.
But i’ll try to get sleep anyway.

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